The Poseidon Explosion (1975)

Finally I make it back to the Grindhouse film set. A vessel of Panamanian registry, in an Italian canal, is loaded with fertilizer, diesel fuel and air canisters, and also happens to be on fire. This of course presents an obvious problem, and naval officers, dock workers, and members of a wedding party (seriously) must do their best to prevent the inevitable explosion from leveling a nearby town. The movie spends so much time following city officials reacting to the crises and debating wether or not to evacuate the town, that the story started to feel like it would be more interesting as an episode of Frontline, then the not-quite suspense movie about crises management it ultimately is. In fact you could make an episode of Frontline out of this I suppose, because it turns out (thank you end credits roll) that this story actually happened, only they changed the name of the explosive boat to Poseidon, presumably to capitalize off the popularity of the far superior 1972 adventure film from producer Irwin Allen. This flick is so dry and uncompeling (it really shouldn’t be, I mean a huge boat could explode at any moment) that I read through most of it, a failure as entertainment. Grade: F.